Bernard Grebanier on Shakespeare: "-- habitually he transformed adjectives into nouns, nouns into verbs, verbs into nouns, and in general played havoc with grammatical tradition."
I'm endlessly amazed by the staggering stupidity of demi-puppet lit-bloggers. I get a quick image in my head of resting beribboned cats in cages behind glass, pretty and unquestioning of their limited but brightly-lit pet shop world. They're waiting for some human or publisher to come along and pluck them out! And take them home to some comfortable mansion where they can go on resting blinking luxuriously, perpetually acceptingly unquestioningly unquestionably not thinking about anything.
Leaders among the fluffy stupid animals are bad enough, exemplified by the tedious torturous reasonings of Daniel "Polonius" Radosh. Other lit-bloggers, the followers, don't even bother to rationalize their stance, making no effort toward showing a glimpse of original or independent thought.
As example we have "Old Hag" blogger Lizzie Skurnick, who chastized me recently for bad syntax. Bad syntax! Wow! Criminal behavior in lit-blogger land. There stands the fifth-grade schoolteacher, ruler in hand, ready to chase away any and all enthusiasm for language with her book of constipated precepts. "Let's eliminate originality and verve from your sentences, students!" the teacher insists. "Remember the rules!"
This is a person whose mind stays within acceptably narrow corridors of thought. The ship of literature is sinking as swiftly as the Titanic, but Lizzie the Hall Monitor of Language is ready to squelch every solution that doesn't conform to Chapter and Section specification of the properly designated code. It's a mentality adopted by writers who have no talent. All they have is their rules. Language to them is reduced to rules. Shakespeare himself didn't care overmuch for syntax (or spelling, for that matter), but we live in a more sophisticated more regulated more ridiculous era.
This is the Age of the Bureaucrat. Those who prosper within the regulated Machine aren't the nonconformists, but the bureaucrats. Quick investigation reveals that Lizzie fits this category well. Her unremarkable blog is devoted to rumors thoughts information and gossip concerning who's been or will be published by the corporate book world. (Or, which of her waiting pet-shop mates has found a home.) Play the game by the accepted rules-- step by slow step. Ascend the narrow staircase of conformity level by level. This is exactly what Lizzie did. She has a B.A. from Yale (not an easy school to get into, I'm told) and an M.A. in Poetry from the John Hopkins Writing Seminars-- where she learned not to take joy from the wild uninhibited use of language, like ULAers, but simply how to follow the rules. She did learn about syntax!
(One can be certain that Lizzie Skurnick as a child always colored strictly within the lines of her coloring book-- and still does. Her crayons are well-aligned, and always go back exactly the same way into the box.)
The only problem with worrying about "syntax" is that when you do, you immediately turn off 99% of the public, who were turned off to literature and poetry by having declensions, gerunds and syntax in school shoved down their throats!
Down with syntax!
Power to the Underground Literary Alliance, reviver of language, savior of literature!