Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Winning the Argument

The Underground Literary Alliance already has. Our foes are reduced to imitating us or anonymously attacking us.

We offer integrity, independence, and change-- an unbeatable combination.


frantic said...

so how come the stuff you publish stinks like week old garbage? inquiring minds want to know!

- Leopold said...

Well, inquiring minds on this side would like you to be a bit more specific. Which works, exactly, are you referring to? Which authors? Which works by them have you actually read and what, exactly, is your criticism?

frantic said...

the stuff on the ULA weekly reader blog thing. sheesh, what crap.

my criticism is that it is crap. the fact that you have to publish it yourselves in no accident. i can't get anybody else willingly to smell my farts, much as i enjoy lettin' one rip.

- Leopold said...

"the stuff on the blog thing" Sounds like you've really read through it. But you are failing to be specific again. Which of it is crap? And for what reason?

And, for the record, the ULA Underground Adventures blog posts work by a multitude of undergrounders, not just ULA members. In fact, I'd say more of the stuff on there is non ULA than ULA work. So the fact remains we are also publishing other people's stuff which, as far as I can tell, is more than you have done. The ULA is a diverse group of writers. It really rings incincere when you say it is all crap, because it is all really different. I get the sense that you haven't investigated us seriously at all before posting.

If you are actually interested in finding interesting ULA work, I recommend picking up one of the Slushpile's which I think really represents the excellent writing coming out of the ULA. You can also order Tim Hall's Half-empty, Noah Cicero's The Human War, my The Red Fez and a myriad of other ULA books to get a better idea. In the near future, a lot of ULA projects are going to be coming to the forfront. I've had a chance to see some of them and I think they're gonna really be great.

It seems like you have your mind set already about us, so I doubt I can change it, but it would help your cause when criticizing us to have actually invested the time in actually reading us. I can gauruntee you, we've got more talent than someone whose soul output seems to rely on endless fart analogies...

Patrick @ LitVision said...


It seems you are speaking of the Adventures blog, co-edited by me and M-Ranello. Lately we've had work by ULA poets Chris Robin and Joe Pachinko, and two funny bits by Cry Bloxsome, an Aussie writer. Seems to me this writing has energy and subtance. People can check them out here and decide:

Also, people can see the diverse list of who's been published on that blog here: http://www.literaryrevolution.com/blogography.html

Frantic if you don't like what we're putting up on the Adventures blog, then submit your own work in your real name. All you're offering now is "crap" and "stink" and more "crap," "farts" and "sheesh." That's really helpful, thanks!

frantic said...

i do not make "endless fart anologies."

to be precise, i make an analogy to ULA as an endless fart.

remember: precision of language is a virtue.

- Leopold said...

Yet another fart analogy. Is someone keeping count?

Patrick @ LitVision said...

Booo! You're still not saying anything worth reading. Silly games and cuteness, tee-hee! :)

The ULA is a struggle towards improving things in the lit-world. If you see that as an "endless fart" then you've got issues.

The underground writers in the ULA are a representative sample of people who are willing to step out of line and work toward success, while maintaining personal and artistic integrity. We've got some great writers that we do our best to promote, because their work is worth sharing with the public, and is in fact better than 95% of what's being pushed by the big pub-houses.

Jeff Potter said...

When checking out ULA work don't forget the samples on our website at:


When criticizing anything always give a quick example of what you think is doing it right.

So, Fran, if you think ULA work is bad, please do the slightest bit of helpful extra work and say what you think is better. In this way you don't even have to say why. I don't ask you to think. I'm not asking for much. Just give examples. It's babysteps for a critic. Try 'em! If you can pull it off, you'll have done more than nearly every anti-ULA wastrel who's posted here. C'mon, I'm rooting for you!

Can you see that just saying we suck is useless? Do you like being useless? I hope not. That would be sad.

King said...

Jeff Potter has complained to me privately, in reference to "Frantic," that our anonymous opponents are getting wimpier and wimpier.
To our foes (if there are any not hiding): Do better!

frantic said...

i'm not wimpy, just overcome with nausea, boredom, and the suspicion that nobody could really be as lame as you guys seem to be, so maybe this all just one big absurd pathetic put on. maybe a scam, like where king wenclas turns out to have a felony conviction for mail fraud and is running all of this from his jail cell in omaha. which would be sad! reading this site is just so fucking sad. i weep gentle tears for you.

King said...

??? And yet you continue reading!

frantic said...

i do! i am easily amused. it is similar to my pleasure in the pamphlets of the jehovahs witnesses.

in their case, i particularly enjoy the illustrations. with you guys, it is the dopey cluelessness and the way you are such fans of eggers and so on.

you know, mark david chapman was a big fan of john lennon. he couldn't stop thinking about him! (just like you guys and eggers.) if there had been the internet in 1980 then chapman would have posted long articles about how much john lennon was concerned with him. when really lennon was just doing his thing and didn't pay any attention to chapman at all. it is all so sad!

frantic said...

a postscript:

not that the analogy is perfect. lennon was a genius. eggers is a weenie. but the important thing is that they both had obsessed fanboys.

chilly charlie said...

Frantic is Tim Hall.

And Dean Haspiel (Deanhaspiel.com) is his best bud.

Don't buy Dean Haspiel's comics.